Saturday, April 30, 2005

Still in office...

It is always a pain to work till this late. The quietness and desertedness of the office always freak me out. Not because I am timid, the silentness simply makes me feel kind of lonely and slightly pathetic to be still working on a supposedly happening Friday. I feel I lead a monotonous life. The blasting air con makes me feel worse, chilled and pitiable. And the fact that no one will pity me for having to work so late. And guess what, I am not really working but am waiting for others to finish their work and to review it. I sounded innocent, but some may say it is my responsibility to review the final product. Anyway, I feel so lethargic of doing nothing and still have to work overtime.

Now, my back is aching. Must be the jogging session I had 2 days ago. I can’t help but thinking and feeling that I am already OLD. Can’t take late nights anymore. I don’t fancy the idea of working on Friday and go home on Saturday. I call this ill-fated. I don’t owe loan shark money, why do I have to resort of staying so late just for work?

I wish I am filthy rich so I can say no to overtime.

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Gloomy Friday...

Today is finally Friday and here I am, stuck in the office, glued to my seat... How uninteresting… Oh God! I yearn to go HOME.

I considered Monday a public holiday a bless! Time to unwind myself…

Hope today is not as dreadful as yesterday where I reached home past midnight. *sign* The world is so unfair or maybe you can say that I have no team spirit. Kekeke… Let me analyze. My job is to test what the developers have fixed and ensure that the system is error free before releasing out to the client. Plus, I have to do documentation on the release. Very often I spent my precious time, waiting for the brilliant (supposedly) developers to finish their fixes then I can proceed with the testing. The waiting time is a horrendous! I feel so innocent. Developers will head home after their fixes and perhaps sometimes they will wait till we pass the test. Special note: I said “sometimes” Me? Stay in the office to test and complete the release documentation. Is this right? You may say I don’t have team spirit, but how about the developers? Do you think they have any when they leave their team members in the office?

If I am a developer, I will probably leave the jinxed office too. "Since I already finished my fix why should i wait... I still want to watch TV ok?!" So no point blaming them. Anyway, my conclusion is, there is not such thing as “Equality” in life. All this talk about equality… *sign sign sign*. The only thing people really have in common is that they are all going to die.

Right now, 8:01PM, I am still waiting for the [not]-so-brilliant developers to finish up their work [mess]… wonder is their 30minutes-will-fix promise going to drag till 3 hours… keep my fingers crossed.

I can imagine it must be crowded at Orchard Road.... *sob*


Friday, April 29, 2005


I have been down in the dumps lately. Nothing can really lift me up except Kevin and Bird Nest. Ok and Coby. Something happened @ work, but I did learn some painful and yet meaningful lessons from the happening. Firstly, I learn that people look at me as a UNIQUE case @ work. Secondly, the society is fucked up. Thirdly, this incident actually spotlighted the characters of many people whom I thought I know. I will not elaborate further on the 3 things but it is about being fed up with the company’s policy!

It seems to me no one can relate to what I am feeling so I decided to talk to a friend. He is a poly friend of mine, Gavin. He is very sympathetic towards me, and I didn’t know we are suffering from the same problem @ work. He knows what I am actually experiencing because we are both poly students. No one understands the frustration I faced, except a poly grad like him. That is so comforting to be understood rather than be misunderstood.

Both of us are the victims of the company’s so-called policy plus we are not valued for our expertise, btw, we are working in the same company except different branch. Anyway, I am in a dilemma of whether I should quit my job and after much advice from Kevin perhaps I should continue working however, that doesn’t mean I agree with the fucked up policy.
I still think that greatness lies not in being having high educational level, but in the right use of people for the right work.

My previous post was about job achievement and that spirit is definitely not dampened by what I have been through recently. And here is a quote by Franklin D Roosevelt which I totally have the same opinion:
"Happiness lies not in the mere possession of money; it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of creative effort. The joy and moral stimulation of work no longer must be forgotten in the mad chase of evanescent profits. These dark days will be worth all they cost us if they teach us that our true destiny is not to be ministered unto but to minister to ourselves and to our fellow men."

I figured what I should do now is to wait for an opportunity to move on. Let me quote again from Albert Einstein,
“In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”
Here I am, waiting for the right time to move on. :P

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Wednesday, April 27, 2005

If you are a boss…

If you are a boss, please be compassionate to your staff.
If you are a boss, please don’t expect your staff to work OT. Remember you only pay us during the office hour. We are not obligated to work for you after the official working hours. That includes SAT AND SUN.
If you are a boss, please be generous and reward your staff accordingly. Don’t ever be penny-pinching bastards. Pinch your penis instead, may I suggest!
If you are a boss, please undergo proper phonics lessons. Speak fluent English so we can all understand. “Are you bery cleear wib the projeck sparcification??”
If you are a boss, dismiss the “rice worms” who are professionally trained in Taiji and read newspapers during office hours, they are good for nothing and simply wasting resources.
If you are a boss, you must be fair to all your staff. NO favoritism PLEASE!
The above requirements from a BOSS are reasonable. But somehow, most of the bosses are doing the opposite. Anyway, I am just so frustrated with my boss. Coincidentally, he is just the opposite of everything I expected.


Saturday, April 23, 2005


Yeh! I can finally smell weekend now. But don’t even know if I’m gonna work on weekends. How can I possibly love my job when I “devoted” seven fucking days a week to my oh-so-nice job? Tell me! Anyhow, I will not let this stupid planning dampen my mood. I am so looking forward to the Barbie exhibition and chilling out at Asia Bar later today. I’m sure it is going to be happening! Not majong tonight though… *sob*

Let me digress a little. Ok, if you know me, you should know that I am working for a reputable telecommunication provider. And again, if you know me, you should know I always travel by cab. Do I look like an insipid and sound like a sweet sounding CUSTOMER SERVICE OFFICER?? I hate people or taxi drivers asking me if I am a customer service officer when I mentioned that I worked in S******. (Singtel or Starhub?? Hehehe…) It’s silly, do I look like I have only completed “O” Level??!! Don’t I look like a professional Technical Writer?! I simply don’t understand, do these ignorant people know that S****** has other appointments apart from the mundane Customer Service officer job that everybody knows? Customer Service officers are the one they deal with day in day out but that doesn’t mean there is no other useful people in the company liao… understand?? Give me a break if you intend to ask if I am a Customer Service Officer. I will break your neck. I have had enough!

Disclaimer: I don’t think Customer Service officer is not an interesting job but com’on, I am not lor!

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Thursday, April 21, 2005

Do you GOSSIP?

I discovered something. Maybe I am slow on the uptake but hey, at least I realized that and it is not too late. Ok, here is my conclusion. No One Is Reliable In This World! Everyone Gossips About Others *roll eyes*

Do you always gossip to other friends about your good friend? Reveal bad things about your friend behind him or her? Don’t try to look away. *wave hand in the air* Yes! I am referring to you!

No matter how strong the friendship bonds are, how pleasant that person is, how dependable he or she looks, conclusion is, DON’T TRUST THEM. Disclaimer here, I haven’t really got betrayed by friends, but somehow, I figured that human are too complicate to get understand.

For example, I have 2 good friends, K and T. From outsiders’ point of view, they are very close friends. They will share the same drinks, wear the same tops, shop together and even share secrets. I, being friends of K and T, will never think that are actually dejected to hang out with each other since they known to be “SISTERS”. Somehow one day, K came up to me and complaint, “T thinks she is very pretty. Can’t stand her! I tell you, dun think she is big breasted, she is actually wearing a maximiser!!”. I was alarmed to hear that, and I thought they are supposed to be great friends. How can she blurt bad things about her behind her back? Funny enough, T also gossips to me about K. Now, two friends, close enough to be “sisters” are revealing their discontentment to other people.

I am not really bothered by them, but I was imagining what if my good friends reveal my bad habits to other people too? Hmmm… I’m sure they have. It is human character to gossip, course I myself gossip too. Maybe the key is to what extent one gossips.

Or even maybe gossiping is like a rapport to build among friends and colleagues and perhaps strengthen the relationship when you realized that you have a common gossip targets. Just some of my thoughts…

But I know one person will never gossip bad things about me, that’s my mum.

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Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Ambition or Money?

Have you ever had the feeling like you want to quit your job and walk out of the office for no specific reason? Perhaps you will ask yourself, “Is this what I want?” and quite often, you will realized that working in this area is not what you really hope for, mostly, it is about earning a humble or loaded stipend . Try asking yourself this question, is it money or ambition that is important to you?

I wanted so much to say its AMBITION, but I am afraid that in this society, not many privilege people can rely on their ambition for a living. It’s sad that success is often measured almost exclusively in financial terms and possessions.

Isn’t it a luxury to do something you love and still get paid? For example, David Beckham (I assume he loves football), he is paid lavishly and abundantly and still football is the love of his life.

Then again, yesterday I was thinking to myself on bed, if given a choice below:
1.Earn $X and work is simple and relaxing. No sense of achievement.
2. Earn $X and work is taxing and requires many responsibility. Definitely a great sense of achievement.

Note: $X is a large sum of money.

Which one will you choose? I will choose the latter. Why?

I have no idea, but I was thinking, if $X is a large sum of money, then all the more I should work harder to make sure that I am worth paying $X right? I love to have the sense of achievement. I believe accomplishments are the pushing force that makes me strive forward and to work harder. I can’t imagine sitting in the office doing nothing will do me any good. A worthless person will never know the meaning of lives. Or maybe I should add, I enjoy being busy kekekeke…

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Oh, are you a doctor??

How to trust a doctor? I wonder what makes a person a doctor? What it takes to become a doctor?

Proper training? Memorizing all the medicines or theories?

I started to lose trust on doctors now. I was disappointed, not once but three times. Let me tell you my painful experiences.

First Experience: A doctor from a well known reputable chain clinics, which starts with the alphabet “R”. That was a real bad experience. The doctor is from HELL. He is obnoxious, rude and dishonest. He is definitely very unprofessional, unethical. I shall not elaborate on what had happened, because that will start the fire in me again. Let’s just put it in a way that he gave me a wrong diagnosis, saying that what’s on my face was acne and not allergy, despite me telling him that he could be wrong. He insisted he was right and me, trusting his professionalism and the fact that that is a reputable clinic. I trusted the wrong doctor. My condition got worse and I complained. Here comes the best part, I called him up and he yelled at me. Literally screaming at me, in his pathetic Compass Point branch clinic. BTW, he is the head doctor there…. *puke* How can a doctor from hell become a head doctor? He should be the head of all ghosts. He said that refunding me is a small issue and he will not refund me a single cent. He even threatened to call a lawyer to sue me for harassing him. Hahaha…. A doctor who likes to joke. I don’t even know since when I am harassing him. And I didn’t know that doctors can sue their patients for their own wrong diagnosis. He was constantly shouting at me and I thought he has gone berserk. What to do? I am just a patient who visits a gangster doctor. I want to emphasize this, you know what he said? He even told me refunding me is not a problem because the amount he is refunding me is PEANUTS to him. I don’t understand why a doctor will say that. At least now I know, doctors are earning more than peanuts. How it ended? Another R clinic doctor called me and willing to refund my medical bill to me out of the goodwill of the clinic. Goodwill? Haha… nice word to use. Anyway, I will complaint to the medical board if I have the time to deal with gangsters. I don’t understand how that hooligan can become a doctor. Perhaps medical board should make doctors go through mental and emotional check before letting them out to become doctors. If they fail, they should be kept in cages and make sure they dun come out and bark at ppl.

Second Experience: From a small clinic. I just want to get some hormones medicine. She gave me a particular medicine and told me I should not have any side effect. And guess what, there is a side effect, outbreak of acne on my face. I wonder she knows what it means by SIDE EFFECT. Anyway, I think I am not going to lodge a complaint against her, since she is already old and she looks like she is suffering from Parkinson disease.

[Most Recent]
Third Experience: From the well know Skin specialist in Singapore. Happened last Thursday. I trusted this specialist center a lot. And now, I am disappointed once again. Maybe it’s the doctor. I dun know. My rashes got worse after the first set of medicine he gave me. And I called the center to ask for the same doctor again. So coincidently the center closes at 5pm. And I called them at 445pm. I talked to the reception that I was allergic to the medicine the doctor gave me and asked to set an appointment with the doctor at 530 or 6pm (they only see patients by appointment only). Guess what the reception told me, she said why not I just book an appointment with him next week. I was amazed by what she said. Did she bring her brain to work? Or she is suffering from some mental disorder? A patient who spent 100bucks on medical bills calling to see the doctor due to allergy to medicine was asked to make another appointment next week?! I confirmed that she is having some mental disorder. CONFIRM! I ignore her wise advice and I go down to the center. And yes, I was given priority to see the doctor again. This time the doctor promised that the rashes will subside within 24 to 48 hours. Cool huh… Now, 60 hours have past, here they are, my rashes are still stuck onto my skin. Promises… promises… So funny. The worst thing is, I see another trusted doctor and he told me the medicine given by the doctor at the specialist center are used to treat acne and not rashes. My god! Now, I am eating the right medicine and let’s wait for miracle to happen.

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Monday, April 11, 2005

Burn Myself

I have the damned rashes back again. I hate rashes. Why am I such a problematic person that I always have allergy to this and that. The itch is killing me. I feel like drowning myself in hot oil to get rid of the itch. It is just intolerable. No one can help me, even the doctors. Am I going to die?
Why am I so unlucky to get rashes? It was like that last year and now, I got it again. When will I ever get lucky again?
Ok, I am just grumbling. Ignore me. I am a pest.


Wednesday, April 6, 2005

Project Project Project.... Business Trips

I am sick of the word “Project”. I have been working on my university project for the past one month, my company’s project for the past one year… I really need a break! I am so occupied that I don’t even have time to focus on my personal affairs like catching up with my friends, watch an extremely pricey movie, hit the gym….updating my blog… Anything you name it… All of a sudden, I just want to pack up and leave the jam-packed and competitive Earth, escaping all the commitments that are just too weighty for me to lug. What is so great about life when one is constantly looking forward to only weekends and enjoys only the weekends? It’s upsetting, isn’t it? Sign… I hate to go on a business trip and so coincidentally, I am always involved in it… somehow… What can I do? I need a job… Singaporeans are constantly caught in a rat race and I am no exception. I can’t imagine how life can be so wonderful when we have no commitments, no mobile phone bills to worry, no unsettled credit cards bills, not having to think what to have for dinner (yes, I consider thinking of a nice place for dinner is a major chore too!).

Back to the topic of going on a business trip. Many must have fancy the idea of traveling for business, taking it as an opportunity to explore the world and to gain more sights of what is the outside Singapore. But I am just too tired. Working in a foreign land is never going to be easy. Imagine waking up at a bed which you will never have good sleep, getting to work earlier than you supposed to be (since I am always late!), no cha kway tiao for lunch, travel back to the hotel and end the day of work in bed while watching television. Here comes the worst of all things, no one to talk to.

How can I possibly love to go on a business trip? Damn… I am leaving on the 14th April.

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